Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris. , What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris’ victims before they died? His shoe. Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris. Superman changed his name to Wonder Woman after serving in prison with Chuck Norris There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live Chuck Norris protects his airbag in an accident CNN was originally created as the “Chuck Norris Network” to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain There’s no blood in Chuck Norris’ veins. It’s just one long strand of tobacco spit Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse you in the face, There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live. Ford’s are built “Chuck Norris” tough The chief export of Chuck Norris is Pain. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Massacre There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist, CNN was originally created as the “Chuck Norris Network” to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time, Godzilla once challenged King Kong to an arm wrestling match. The winner was Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice. Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11… a suicide. Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever, Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse you in the face Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing Note to self: Don’t be the cashier to tell Chuck Norris his coupons have expired The quickest way to a man’s heart is with Chuck Norris’ fist, There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live, The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer.

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